I’m in a group online. A wonderful group full of wonderful women who support and build each other up. We have the hole (it belongs to someone but wont mention her here). Its our Room 101. Many who have wronged us have been sent there… now for my submission.
You know the mums I’m talking about. The ones whose kids walked at a month old, is reading Shakespeare at 6months… already got their masters at 1.
Its not just their kids either they get competitive over. Its EVERY SINGLE BIT of motherhood. And not just the good bits. They’ll either have had it better than you or worse than you.
‘I was back in my pre pregnancy clothes the day after the twins were born’ (LIE!!!!!!)
‘Oh you breastfed for 18months… I’m still feeding Timothy now and he’s off to school next week’ (Good for you… whatever works)’
‘I only put on 5lbs while I was pregnant.’
‘Wow I wish I’d been in labour for only 24 hours… I was like that for weeks….’
‘Abigail was quite the conversationalist at 6months… is he not talking yet?’
You get the picture…
Now the thing is we all think our kids are the bees knees. I’d brag about every little thing Isaac does if I thought people were listening. They are pretty amazing little people… seeing them develop and learn. HOWEVER, its not a competition… yes its a great achievement and I love to hear how kids are getting on or how you’re getting on in pregnancy/motherhood but just remember some people have doubts over their abilities. Some people are now freaking out because their little one isn’t speaking. Or struggling with body confidence. Their little wins are suddenly made to feel like nothing. I got my son to eat some broccoli… its an achievement… I don’t need you telling me how all your kid eats is organic veg and would sneer at a potato chip. My kid started saying ‘goodbye’ but now you’re telling me at the same age wee Jimmy was conversing in French. Again ITS NOT A COMPETITION!! Motherhood is hard without this and kids learn and do things at their own pace. No two kids are the same.
Instead of competing how about we support. Cheer on the little wins. Let’s build each other up instead of feeding the doubts. #mumsupportingmums